Tag Archives: Divine

Queen Anne’s Lace

Queen-Anne’s Lace

By William Carlos Williams

 

Her body is not so white as

anemony petals nor so smooth—nor

so remote a thing.

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It is a field

of the wild carrot taking

the field by force;  the grass

does not raise above it.

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Here is no question of whiteness,

white as can be, with a purple mole

at the center of each flower.

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Each flower is a hand’s span

of her whiteness. Wherever

his hand has lain there is

a tiny purple blemish.

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Each part

is a blossom under his touch

to which the fibres of her being

stem one by one, each to its end,

until the whole field is a

white desire, empty,

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a single stem,

a cluster, flower by flower,

a pious wish to whiteness gone over—

or nothing.

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Art is born…

Opening the Artist Way this morning for the first time in a while, the opening lines of the introduction to the 10th Anniversary Edition spoke volumes to me;

“ART IS A SPIRITUAL transaction.

Artist are visionaries. We routinely practice a from of faith, seeing clearly and moving toward a creative goal that shimmers in the distance——often visible to us, but invisible to those around us. Difficult as it is to remember, it is our work that creates the market, not the market that creates our work. Art is an act of faith, and we practice practicing it. Sometimes we are called on pilgrimages on its behalf  and, like many pilgrims, we doubt the call even as we answer it. But answer we do.”

in the details

Answering the call is returning to write this blog through the dark tunnels of caregiving as well as the shimmering light that attracts my eye to create along with natures grace the sharing of beauty. It is the beauty that allows sanity to be maintained.

” Art is born in attention. It is midwife to detail. Art may seem to spring from pain, but perhaps that is because pain serves to focus our attention onto details…”  When the gift of photography was shared with me from the perspective of a gathering of Shamans, in the message that stated, “the property wishes to be recognized” the property being the 175 acre retreat I live at. The land was calling out, I soon discovered so was my soul, so was my voice, asking to be seen and heard. Photography/art allowed me to be seen and heard, and to participate in events, situations, what seems like the side lines, yet in truth, placing a camera in front of my face gave me the gift of “seeing” for the first time, really seeing what I was looking at. Offered me detail, lights and shadows.

Now a few years later,  pursuing photography has opened doors and a few windows that have led to a world so unknown to be before. Art! Art can soothe which it usually does for me, taking the dogs and camera for a walk, moves me into another world, a world of amazing sites even when I have seen them a thousand times, when I don’t see them, it means I am not present, and I a looking for something instead of just being still, allow presence to stream over or into me…

The colors of Blue

The practice is not only to make photographs but to self educate about art. The art of photography is huge and getting bigger, and I am only a small drop of colored light that gleams to paint the world with light. I am challenged by my concepts of photography, ever evolving, as well as what art is… and what it is not.

Purity of rain

I was extremely challenged a few days ago by photography work I was viewing in this ever evolving world when I came across what is call “art” photography, in the sense of creating something and photographing that to make a statement. (it has been suggested that I attempt to record the process of caregiving and depression, which I have considered) yet these photographers have taken something that was ordinary and maybe kinky, one knits shrouds, which where to represent her feelings of invisibility about her relations and her art. Playful and colorful as they were I began to see them to create more invisibility. Than there is a guy who has made beautiful sculpture like images of bound people in stark architectural sittings… These images awakened something dark, and frightening in me… the darkness and captivity of illness and caregiving. To move beyond that I knew I had to continue with the blog, I had to repurpose my photography into a source of Love and light. It had to become my voice, it had to be the visible me, even through I am not “present” my presence is in the work, in the detail, in the faith, beauty wins.

Question: Do you know where you attention to is?

Soul Journey

The quotes here are quotes I have collected over the past year or so, they have been selected to express the experience of the last few months. My own words at this time will not convey that which has been in process. These words resonate, inspire, enlighten, and shine life light on the journey past, present, and into the future.

“We must remember that REAL change takes time. Growers are inchworms. Lasting transformation is an incremental process, one “soulstep” at a time. We can have all the peak experiences we want but the real work happens between the peaks, while laying down and integrating on the valley floor. This may frustrate us, but it is the only way to craft an awareness that is authentic and sustainable. Divine perspiration…” Jeff Brown

 

 

“Although the journey home is often difficult, its also wondrous. On the materialistic treasure hunt, satisfactions are fleeting. On the inner treasure hunt, your satisfaction builds. It’s so beautiful to touch a new plateau of awareness, to view your self with a broadened lens, to shape your self with your own two hands. Every time I unravel a piece of my karmic thread, I feel the God-self come a little bit closer.. ” Jeff Brown

“The art form of the Soulshaping journey is knowing when to assert, & when to surrender. There are times when utilizing our will is perfect in order to excavate our path from the deep within, but there are also times when glimpses of path float to the surface only when we’re in a receptive state. Some shaping happens through our own efforts, some happens when we lay back & let the universe do the shaping for us.” Jeff Brown

 

“With respect to path, I feel the primary goal is to identify our unique soul-scriptures, to walk in our own two shoes & no one else’s. Not to say that every moment will be blissful-we still have to deal with the world etc- but to reach the stage where we know that we are where we are supposed to be on our Soulshaping journeys. Not where someone else told us to be, but our own true-path. This is what I wish for us.” Jeff Brown

 

“When you walk through the gateway of your sacred purpose, you walk into yourself. Blessingly buffered from the madness of the world, your purpose filters out those relationships and energies that undermine your expansion. Infused with vitality and a clarified focus, new pathways of possibility appear where before there were obstacles. Life still has its challenges, but you interface with them differently, coated in an authenticity of purpose that sees through the veils to what really matters. The rivers of essence rise up to meet you, carrying you from one wave of expansion to another…” (Soulshaping) Jeff Brown

 

“Going with the flow” means listening to your inner guidance ~ not sitting back, waiting and doing nothing. In order for us to get in touch with our inner guidance we need to spend time in meditation stilling the mind. When the mind is overactive, it is impossible to receive clarity. 15 minutes of stillness ~ everyday ~ will open up the tubes and channels to your higher self and open up the “flow” of communication from your higher wisdom. In order to go with the flow, you must first be in the flow.” ~ Sabrina

 

“God, the supreme artist, uses our life for the creation of art. We are the instruments through which the force of life expresses itself. We express our art in everything we say, everything we feel, and everything we do. The creation is ongoing, it is endless, it is happening in every moment.” ~ Don Miguel Ruiz

The journey is always full, it is our perspective that gives in life, shares its meaning. I am grateful for the journey, I am grateful for my friends and followers who kept silent while still asking… I am Love!

Expect abundance!

Expect your every need to be met, expect the answers to every problem, expect abundance on every level, expect to grow spiritually. Eileen Caddy

Over exposed

I am not sure this is the quote that I wanted but it is the one that showed up. It got words on the page, and the flow to begin to move out. Spirit has been nudging me to write for days, write what is the question. 1. A review of the month. 2. The sense of loneliness that has kept in since last Sunday. 3. The up coming First Friday Solo Show. I am sure there are more themes yet those three could fill many pages.

a winters morning

Stuck already: No not stuck just not sure how to begin… is that not the same thing? Not if I say it is not. The month began with seeking to “listen to the voices of the Ancient Ones as they rise on the warm winds of summer and shimmer on the lighted grasses that wave gently in the summer sun: June is the month of Sunlight, a month when abundance from the seeds we have planted in early spring begin to produce their bounty.

A winter's afternoon

Those lead to the Juried art show exhibit, the Salem County Art League’s shared artist exhibit last weekend, which runs until September,  and now to my First Philadelphia First Friday Solo show, at Balance Gallery tomorrow for the month of July! The creative abundance is presenting itself in glorious ways. I am extremely grateful, that I listened to the sounds, followed the paths, was given the courage to show up, to present work that is joyfully accepted and viewed.

Golden fall

Last evening I emailed the person in charge of the creative works at the William Way center where the Juried art exhibit now hangs, and ask her if she was willing to mention the the group that meets for First Friday events about my Solo show, her response was: “Congratulations on the solo exhibition, it is much deserved.  I would be happy to announce to the guys about your show and strongly encourage them to wander over there!”  Sometimes I am surprised by peoples response, and awed by them as well. I also received this message from a artist friend on facebook after I invited her to the Opening reception, I know she could not attend but I like to send invites it informs people what is going and I believe share the abundance. Her response, “I look forward to reading an after exhibit blog and art lovers comments. The one common denominator of your work is that when viewing each piece on the web, they are not just photographs but a beautiful essence shows thru the screen.”

Summer in the wood

There are more such quotes for the photography that I present to the world, and I am grateful the praise, it is what keeps me coming back, not in an ego way, of course ego is joyously taking all of this in, but in a artistic way to light the path along my creative journey. That the work/art that I do has a value and purpose to people! Most grateful !

Land and sky

For as I go into this Solo Show Nature and Sky there is a sense of fear the is underlying this whole event. Plus the censor is trying to sabotage the joy of this event. Here are the voices, “this is a small venue, it is small exhibit 6-7 pieces, who is going to see it in Balance Gallery Studio other then the clients who attend appointments” Also I have not hung 8 x 10’s in a while which the majority of the show is, they are all new works expect one, and no one has seen the older piece, yet I have doubts about this collection. Is bigger really better? Do this photographs represent Nature and Sky ? Oy ! Plus the other voice keeps saying, “who is going to show up, this venue is so out of the way of true First Friday events and it is only an hour long reception!”

Yes the photographs represent Nature and Sky this is what you do! This is what you were called to do, to share nature with the world. The gallery has its own clients and most likely a system to announce these events. You have invited a number of people, so let go and let God. “Expect your every need to be met…”

Clouds on the ground !

Did I avoid the 2 theme long enough?  A sense of Loneliness ! Since Sunday after the exhibit/reception I have had this sense of doing all this alone, that I had expectation of family and friends to show up to encourage and support all my efforts. Yet they did not. I just blogged about in the pervious blog. Yet I had not mentioned the sense of loneliness that has dogged me ever since. Who are my friends, do I have friends, “skin” friends, meaning people other then the ones on facebook and blogger which I am very grateful for. Yet the “need” for companionship of like minded beings in my life seems to have cast a shadow, so to speak over things. Julia Cameron makes this statement in the Artist’s Way, “very often, when we cannot seem to find an adequate supply, it is because we are insisting on a particular human source of supply. We must learn to let flow manifest itself where it will – not where we will it.”  So once again getting out my own way, telling ego all is well, letting go, and allowing spirit to have its way with each and every situation opens the flow, keeps the river running and the ground fertile for abundant growth.

Growth Question: How was the month of June for you?

Photographs call be viewed and purchase at  here

This is the Nature and Sky Collection!

Aspects of the Divine Mother

May is a month of gratitude and celebration of the feminine

aspect of God

God the Mother

Sacred Feminine

who creates and nurtures all things, including ourselves.

                  The beauty of May draws us out of hibernation into  natural mindfulness of the blessings and                            abundance of nature. Gratitude and mindfulness are intimately related, for as we practice                                  gratitude we come more aware, more present.

the awakened path

                                                                                              We wake up.

                  Spring calls us to simplify our lives so the we can enjoy everything more thoroughly and                                      graciously– our relationships, our homes, our possessions.

In May our hearts remember what our minds sometimes forget–

Life is a gift of inestimable value.

an offering of beauty

It is time to unwrap that gift.

Listen to the voices of the Ancient Ones as they speak                                                                                                        from within the heart of the quickening earth:

The scent of the Mother

Bear cubs play in the sun,

grazing on the new growth that Earth Mother has provided.

The simple pleasures of spring rain,

opening buds and new moons

draw us out of worried mind

into celebration of Divine Mind.

The Archangel Uriel and the

energies of the East

tutor us in the art

of mindfulness

and the sacrament

of gratitude.

Joan Borysenko

Since I was a child in the month of May I created an altar to the Blessed Mother, and was very attracted to the idea of honoring the Mother, I did not truly understand than what I know now of the balancing of the feminine and masculine energies. For than the separation was more far apart, to me yet closer than I understood. I was born of the feast day of the Assumption, August 15, a day to honor the Virgin’s assumption into heaven, that she was brought body and soul to heaven. In the belief of that caused even more separation. Bringing the Divine feminine fully present in this world is a powerful tool of healing, a powerful experience as Andrew Harvey states that the Divine Mother is saying, “Bring everything into balance, marry the opposites within you.” He goes on to explain “that means bring the derided and negated feminine into the picture so completely that the real balance is established between yin and yang. And out of that real and mysterious balance a new order, a new love, is born in each of us in the ground of our being…”

So I give you my offering of gratitude to Our Divine Mother better late then not at all. Andrew Harvey describes the Divine Mother as “the mother aspect of the nature of God. I see “Her” as the power of love that infuses the entire creation, the force that is continually creating the creation and also the transcendence that holds the creation forever in arms of light. Everything is born from “Her” and “She” loves all things with Tender passionate Love.”

Growth Question: How do you Honor the Divine Mother in your Life?

Not Knowing

Make your own recovery the first priority in your life. Robin Norwood

simple beauty!

My first thoughts was that I could and would write this morning, that the block had opened, the I felt different for the first time in weeks. Had I prayed for this you bet, had I reflected on why I was in the state I was in sure, had I any idea not it real tangible way. I consciously asked before sleep that this darkness pass, the block be undone. The message I received this morning was that the moment was right. To begin walking again. Walking in the light of spirit, with the winds of creativity lifting heart and hands to move beyond where I was. I realized I do not generally get colds or illness, yet I am overcome for weeks at a time with melancholy, depression, lack of interest, lack of trust and fear are my constant companions, and I have to welcome them for what ever reason. Had I made the wrong choices, went down the incorrect path, because all of a sudden the world became dark, and frightening to some degree.

A month or so ago, I was told by a healer, that I had spirits that lingered and that they caused much of the heaviness that I experience at times. That I needed to do ritual every so often to ask them to leave, which of course I had not done. Even writing this I feel some presence pushing, pulling at me, could be just ego rearing its impatience with me.

Ever Green

 

So when I sat at the computer this morning and it would connect to the internet I was like, Oh sure here we go, I have been lead to write and the path is block, yet it is only blocked by my own ability to see my options. Yes I like the wordpress.com’s ablitiy to word process, for I don’t have word on my computer, I have to use TextEdit whatever the heck that is? But it is a writing tool and usable to create a document in some fashion.  At once I open ITunes to listen to music to set the correct tone, and that format had changed as well, yikes!

Yet what had not changed was my ability to write, to read the suggested principles in the Artist’s Way and the Rule of the Road, to set me on the path, along that path, flipping through the book, words and sentance caught me attention, shown light on places in my mind giving it much needed energy to once again breathe, to experience, to be awed by life itself. Not to dwell in the dark, empty world of facebook, and games, TV even though we now get Turner Movie Classic station, they are no subsitutes for “real” life, the roads into it, because I sat there yesterday afternoon watching a film about Our Lady of Fatima experiencing tears of joy and saddness all at the same time. The innocents of these children, their belief and faith inspite of the family and world thinking that had made it all up, the church and government fully against them, yet determined to see the Lady every month, and each month more and more people traveled miles to be in the presence of these childern and the “Lady”.  I sat there as well wondering have we really listened to the “Lady’s” advice, do we still need to honor the “mother” for peace to have its way with us? Yes we do need to continue to honor the Mother, Gaia, the Mother of all Life, the giver of all life, it is in our child like belief to see Mother, in the frost on the ground, hear her voice in the bird that sings from the branch above, feel her caress in as the winds blow across your face, feel her life force in the breath we take each moment, along with the rest of the earth and universe.

Source

A few weeks ago I recieved the next sections of the Life Harmony program “Self-Reflection” I read it, with the consciousness that I had read all of this before, had I? Yes. Yet it did nothing to help my state of mind or spirt only made me more discontent, saying to myself I am no more closers to the practice than I was months ago when I started, that I stopped doing all the suggested practices weeks before.  Yet knowing during the summer I began to get more invovled in my life again, that I felt more energy, that I was eating healthier, I was getting more social, and in some ways more creative. The pages/blog where welcomed practices that informed, enlightented, energized, guided, and shared with my own ego and the world around me what the heck I was doing. It was a record of the path I had taken, the thoughts that I thought, the actions I had taken or the intentions I had to accomplished contiue on my journey to harmony. The path of “self-reflection” is lead by finding the balance in that balance “we enjoy qualities from the constructive side of self. These include feeling connected to our senses of insight, clarity, discernment and fulllillment of personal duty. We are open to unleased, unlimited, potential and possibility.” ( Life Harmony, Laurie Buchanan). Yet at the time I was not feeling these at all, I was completely off balance, I was experiencing negative effects which include, “self-absorption, feeling frustrated, nervous, energtically drained, fear, intolerence, impracticality, and melancholy.” (Life Harmony, L, Buchanan).

Crystalized

I have had to stop to breathe in the music of Joshua Bell, and Puccini: O Mio Babbino Caro from his Romance of the Violin! It has to be one of the most beautifull pieces of music I have heard in my life, as the tears stream down my face, and the emotion just wells with its beauty.

 

So I leave with the statement of what “Self-Relection” is:

I cultivate clarity

I am discerning; I exercise sound judgement

I trust my intuition and insights

I am more aware today thank I was yesterday

I am conscious and mindful

I approach life in a purposeful manner

I inspire others

I utilize positive thinking

I embrace the myseries that I encounter

I am courageous and ask “Why” and “Why Not”?

I am open to new ideas

I am secure with not-knowing

I function from a place of endless possibilities

 

Poem and Photographs

 

Aunt Leaf, Mary Oliver

Needing one, I invented her –

the great-great-aunt dark as hickory

called Shining-Leaf, or Drifting-Cloud

or The-Beauty-of-the-Night.

 

Dear aunt, I’d call into the leaves,

and she’d rise up, like an old log in a pool,

and whisper in a language only the two of us knew

the word that meant follow,

and we’d travel

cheerful as birds

out of the dusty town and into the trees

where she would change us both into something quicker –

two foxes with black feet,

two snakes green as ribbons,

two shimmering fish – and all day we’d travel.

At day’s end she’d leave me back at my own door

with the rest of my family,

who were kind, but solid as wood

and rarely wandered. While she,

old twist of feathers and birch bark,

would walk in circles wide as rain and then

float back

scattering the rags of twilight

on fluttering moth wings;

 

or she’d slouch from the barn like a gray opossum;

 

or she’d hang in the milky moonlight

burning like a medallion,

 

this bone dream, this friend I had to have,

this old woman made out of leaves.

 

In relationship

You have nothing to learn about relationships. You have only to demonstrate what you already know. Conversations with God Bk 1

Painted sky

In the past few days I have been asked about relationships, and I certainly not an expert, and up front I just wish to state I have not been in what A Course in Miracles calls a “special” relationship for a long long time. The longest relationship I have had is with myself, re-discovering who I am is a full-time activity. It is not until I can be in a fully authentic, healthy, growing relationship with myself and my Higher Power that I will expand that experience to a special or romantic relationship. I will say here that I am closer to that now than I have ever been. Within that statement is the beginning of moving beyond the self-imposed victimhood, the self-imposed denial of a special/romantic relationship. For I desired to find out who I was in relationship to everything else in my life. How I respond or react to social, emotional, financial, physical situations, mostly I withdrew. I withdrew out of anger and fear, I withdrew because no one or nothing could live up to me expectations of them. For my expectations or ideals caused me great hurt, when they where suppose to be emanating Love. When I sought Love from the world around me, I was met with everything that did not look or act like love. I caused great grief and depression.

Painted tree tops

What I have learned through experience is that I have to Be Love, I have to come from a loving place whether others are loving or not. I have to find and experience the spirit in each and every situation, no I still don’t get there all the time but I know now how too, I know now when I am not there, when my expectations are leading the way, (ego) when I am seeking something from some one or something, and not just being fully present in the chaos and even joy to bring and be happiness. Asking myself is this who I am, is this who I desire to be at this moment, is this a loving thought or action, if not how can I Be more loving in this situation?

In the Book Conversations with God Book: an uncommon dialogue. Book 1, Neale Donald Walsch is in conversational dialogue with God, ( I know I hear your doubt or maybe I even hear your joy) this book to me has been the doors and windows to my soul, the light on my path, the scripture I keep returning to, the guidance I seek when I am off the path.  Conversations with God (CwG) is a book about relationships, a book about how to be in relationships with yourself with your understanding of who and what God is to you, it is about our relationship with everything, it is about Oneness without ever saying so out rightly.

There is one chapter in CwG 1 that discussing “relationships” loud and clear. Chapter 8 in this chapter Neale ask what we all ask “Is there a way to be happy in relationships?” And God answers with this at the beginning, “Relationship are constantly challenging; constantly calling you to create, express, and experience higher and higher aspects of yourself, grander and grander visions of yourself, ever more magnificent versions of yourself. Nowhere can you do this more immediately, impactfully, and immaculately than in relationships. In fact, without relationships, you can not do it at all.”

These words sung to me, enlightened my path, all it’s defects, and imperfections,  my experience with all my relationships, but first it destroyed all my notions of relationships, and many relationships I had to reevaluate, and many were left behind, so that the beauty and creativity of relationship could begin to inform and grow in grander and grander experience. My heart broke open, sadness and joy danced together, one informing the other, that a balance was the way to live in happiness.

So it was myself I had to put first, not in an egoic way for I had already walked that path, now was a time to find out who I was and it was not what I was told by others, because living my life the way I had lived thus far, in the world was the world lived by others, unconscious doing. CwG once again makes this statement and I think many, if not all people seeking, walking a spiritual path will need to ask and find out. God says; … determining what is best for you will require you to also determine what it is you are trying to do. This is an important step that many people ignore. What are you “up to”? What is your purpose in life”? Without answers to these questions, the matter of what is “best” in any given circumstance with remain a mystery.”

one of many paths

For now I am leaving the mystery to you to find out. My blog/morning pages have been about re-discovering who I am in relationship to myself, my creativity, and the world around me. For without walking that path, without being conscious relationships are unhappy and unfullfilling… Life is one of the most amazing adventures we experience on this plane, living in from the heart fully present is a blessing to all Life.

Growth question: Do you know what you life purpose is? Do you know what you are up to?

I am Love, Jeff

Pursuit of change

Human beings are so uncomfortable with change because at some deep level, on some cellular level, the bigger the change, the greater the opportunity for loss of survival. Neale Donald Walsch

Butterfly's are free

I keep trying to put this off, distracting myself with other things some productive some not so much! So what is it about blogging, writing my pages that causes me to stop in my tracks? Some days I can’t wait to get here, to write, to share, to visualize, to play, to reflect on my progress, if there is any, and there usually is progress, some of it small, some risk taking, going beyond the norm, what has become a norm. I even had the thought when I first got up and sat down at the computer that the first thing I do today is write my blog/pages. Several hours later I am finally here!

Yesterday I message my friend Chris Bartlett Excutive director of the William Way GLBT center in Philly about the up coming Blue Ball, to see whether I could be the official photographer, or not so official for the center or the Radical Faeries who are attending this major fund raising event, which the proceeds go to the center this year. Chris messaged back to come on over. To my surprise and delight! I also had ask him about a project that has been coming up for me emotionally and spiritually, a photographic journal of Transgender people. After I had read a piece on line from the Philadelphia Gay Calendar about a trans woman who had been attacked by some young men in our own gayborhood. I realized we need to place a face on transgendered people, we need to hear and see more of their stories. This theme has not completely fleshed it self out yet, and I was approaching Chris for some of his wisdom and advise on directions, he suggested we talk soon.

a change in color

Once I received his return message I was thrilled and then I was frightened, what the heck have I just committed myself too? Yet I was following spirit, I have been looking for new creative ways to approach my work, to add new energy to my art, and this seem to be a new direction, stepping out of my comfort zone. Breathe! Breathe!

This all did come about as well from my being with faeries in Sorbet Heart Circle/pot luck Sunday evening, and a discussion on the way home with a couple of guys, discussing the evening, the emotional, trusting space that we opened and allowed our heart to speak. Each person came from a deep place, allowing them selves to be truly open. My biggest statement was that I am done victimizing myself, that I am reaching out, I am trusting in the circle of Loving Faeries that I have found companions allow the path to continue to heal, and to grow emotionally, spiritually, and creatively !!!

texture and light!

So I jumped off, I ask an have received affirmation that I was being supported and encouraged!

Received a message from the Salem County Art League that Beans Coffee shop has approached the league to exhibit again. So that exhibit will be Nov 4th 6-8 pm, this will run through Dec. Along with the leagues exhibit at the Pennsville Library from Oct 3  to Oct 16th. Than there is the Philly Photo Society exhibit which I believe is the middle of next month.

Last night another friend David, offered to contact a person he knows about Photographing at the AIDS Walk Oct 17, and to photograph Gay Bingo, gay bingo has been a Philly happening for many years, I have never been. My thoughts around photographing these events is to get a fresh look at functions that may have become too common place, and could use some new life.

How is that for progress?

Growth Question: Do you pursue change? Is it comfortable

Pandora

once you conquer
your selfish self
all your darkness
will change to light

~Maulana Rumi

I see you

My selfish self has been presenting it self still even when I thought I was through the muck it seems I hit another small patch that keep my mind playing tricks with me. One has to ask though how when I have the intention to write, to practice walking the walk as well as talking the talk, I end up with endless chatter, or numbness?  How do I go days without writing, without opening The Artist’s Way, to speak the Basic principle and Rule of the Road, or any other piece that may enfold me in within my essence? How is it that just doing those simple steps frees the egoic self to experience its Higher Self ? What force is greater than the Higher Power? Fear, anger, not enoughness? I think not, yet I seem to allow those feelings to slap me around, lay on top of me, sitting on my chest.  I am through with this behavior, I am enough, I am not afraid of the little self, I can use anger in a purposeful manner! I am through you hear me!!! Either learn the dance or leave!

Wow ! That was a powerful moment! Conquering the darkness is really not what it is about, it is about shinning the light, being in the light, Being the light itself. Not an easy task, creating harmony takes practice. Getting all the piece to fit together in a beautiful sounding song without the balance makes things go Crash, makes a lot of noise, and pulling in different directions.

I have gotten to this place before and walked away, finding fault, discovering new distractions only to desire to come back to this harmony that I begin to hear, and experience, even if only for moments of time. The purpose of The Artist Way, the Life Harmony program, the blog/pages, the reaching out creatively and socially is to add depth and balance to the song of life, the music of living.

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I treated myself to an artist date on Monday to a movie, not just any movie, Avatar 3D IMAX version, I had not seen it the first time so I wished to take the opportunity to view this film as it was supposed to be viewed and created to be seen. I sat there stunned, amazed, moved, touched, sad, angry, and in Love. I sat in the theater giving myself Reiki while watching beauty and destruction dance before my eyes! I had the thought of what the Buddhist express as breathing in the suffering, and breathing out the love…

flittering

Once I got home, and I think I drove home in a state of bliss, I greeted the dogs and went for a walk, camera in hand but more importantly with a new eye, and new vision or at least a refreshed one. Even within the drought conditions beauty of nature finds a bit of water to bloom tiny little purple flowers, the golden rod burst brightly, red and yellow leaves spiral to the ground creating flashes of color in the dryness, and dropping green. Orange, and black Butterfly’s flit here and there, gathering the nectar of the few blossoms they can find, little white moths even share their glory, for a moment I walked in my own Pandora! I have experienced the oneness of nature for a long time through the lens of my camera, through the joy of my being able to experience the everyday evolution that breathes life into life. My ability to take photographs came from nature herself, for she wished to be revealed, she wished to have her beauty experienced not just by nature itself but the care takers of the planet, the people responsible for it continued evolution or its destruction. I don’t take photographs just to have pretty picture around me, I take photographs to nudge people awake, to arouse some emotions, create feelings. I use my photography to tell natures story, for her story has been lost in the everydayness of life, in the commonness, that may cause us to for get to notice the birds, or the huge beautiful tree that stands majestically in your yard or on your way to work.

Shining in the darkness

I guess my artist date did more than I thought it had done, for I thought I lost the energy the film left with me. It had filled the well, inspired, embraced my creativeness to new a presence !

Growth Question: If you haven’t seen Avatar why not, and what the heck are you waiting for?

I am Love, Jeff