On Saturday April 24, 2010 the family attended the Christening of my Grand Niece Caroline. My brother’s second grandchild, the first child of his daughter Lauren and her husband Doug. Two of the most loving enthusiastic parents I ever saw! Really!
At first I was not going to attend because I always feel like such a stranger among my family, for many reason, one being I had not been around all that much in the past 10 years or so. Yet I decided to go at the last moment, ripping throw draws and piles of cloths to see if I had anything decent to wear. I did and I went, I went to record this momentous event as a documenter of family gatherings, for history, to tell a story or just record the history. So there I was among all the other family, both sides, with all types of cameras, cellphone, mini cameras, two video recorders, I am like oh my how do I get around with all those people flashing and recording? I am in a church, should I act like a family member or a photographer? I chose photographer, I got around the people, got on the floor, shook around the back of the priest, I wanted these shot, I wanted to record this moments, that will be only memories in a year or so!
I had the revelation that I find a way into the family gatherings from behind my camera, I can interact with people in different way, I get to see with different I eye, have different experience because I move all over the space, from group to group, person to person, moment to moment, candidly as possible catching those moments… So I am glad I made the choice to attend this Christening, this family gathering.
Growth Question: How do you respond or react in family events? Are they pleasant or a challenge?
The purpose of this blog is to write this blog, to connect with people, sharing my thoughts and journey in writing and photography, as well as other creative opportunity’s that may present themselves.
I have truly lived up to my “reluctant bloger” name this past week or so. As much as I wanted to blog/write I could not concentrate, my mind and thoughts were distracted by distraction of the constant TV in the
background, even with ear pods and beautiful music playing the sound and energy of that idiot box was drowning out any sense of well being I would have to free flow write or to have a continued thought.
The space I share is the dinning room table to be able to hook up to the internet which the TV room is not more then five feet behind me with the sound coming directly into my hearing. So for peace and to write my morning pages, I have either gone to my room or when the weather is nice outside in the yard.
One would wonder what is difference is today: my intention, me ability to go through the challenge, and thus far no TV on!!!
Growth Question: What do you do when confronted by a challenge? What are your methods of extracting yourself, to find peace and serenity?
There was this wondrous paragraph in the Artist’ Waythat stuck me to the core so I think I will write it here to share with people and the path that is now beginning to unfold for me. I have been working the Artist Way path for the past 11 weeks or more, I missed a week, somewhere alone the way, but I was always aware that I wanted to go through the process completely once. My intention is to begin again when I finish week 12. I am on week 11 now, and that is where the quote that I wish to use tonight come from: “ Creativity requires action, and part of that action must be physical. It is one of the pitfalls of Westerners adopting Eastern meditation techniques to bliss out and render ourselves high but dysfunctional.” This is really what hit me, for this is so where I have been. The paragraph goes on, “We lose our grounding and, with it, our capacity to act in the world.” For me fear and mistrust in the world has caused me to doubt myself, doubt if I had a place in it anymore, my spiritual knowledge and wisdom, confused me and I could not feel comfortable around others any more. Julia Cameron offers a remedy for that once we wake up again. She states, “In the pursuit of higher consciousness, we render ourselves unconscious in a new way. Exercise combats this spiritually induced dysfunction… “What we are after here is a moving meditation.” She is talking about walking 2o minutes a day,
I have been doing that for years now… who knew. And I do it several times a day with the dogs and my heels, and my camera in hand, we travel in our little wood, my mind calms, I listen to the trees, I hear the birds about the din of traffic from the NJ Turnpike less then a mile away. Yet here in our little wood we can enjoy the sound and sights of nature, sit under a tree, route for mushroom, and flowers unseen under the growth of sticker bushes and such. All this time I was in a moving meditation. Now that I am more conscious of this practice, and a practice it is, because I can readily walk through the trees unseeing and un-hearing, unaware of anything else but my own concerns and worry’s and that is not why I went out side… “The goal is to connect to a world outside of us, to lose the obsessive self-focus of self-exploration and simply explore. One quickly notes that when the mind is focused on other, the self often comes into a far more accurate focus”
Growth question: What is your moving meditation, are you going to begin a practice of a moving meditation now that you can consciously begin to see the benefits of the practice?
I was truly being the reluctant bloger today! I thought about what I would write all day, even now I am not sure what will present it self here!
We, the family, my sister Arden, her husband, Jim, and Mom attended our cousin Teresa viewing this evening, she transitioned on Monday her 83th Birthday . 8 weeks after she found out she had cancer.
She lived and Loved well, she was a constant companion to my mom, they shared many travels and paths together around, lost of husbands, and children. Yet always ready for a new adventure. So now Teresa adventures have sifted to the other realm, her travels not over but only just begun to emerge in the state of angels, ever gracing those around her with joy and caring.
So I guess our path today is our journey home, are complete trip from this form to the next. Where our Oneness is truly One, or is it, maybe once we get there we desire to come back to a planet and try life one more time? Who knows? In our dreams, in our intentions, in our intuitions, which are full of wisdom and knowledge, does the answer lie there?
Just musing about life and death about Oneness, and our journey Home? Or are we already home? And have just forgotten?
Seems I have created more questions than answer. But as long as I am still asking the questions the journey continues, continues here anyway!
So which one do you take? The one that mothers and fathers suggested for you, or how about teacher and or mentors, did you like their suggestions or have you always walked your own path. A path that maybe not seemed very popular with others, especially your family, and friends? Following our own path is sometimes wondrous and blissful yet sometimes lonely causing thoughts of whether we have taken the right path, or has this all been a waste of time?
Five years ago while living in community at Easton Mountain Retreat center I found a path I did not know I was looking for. I found my self immersed in nature, many of the comforts of the outside world where missing, the distraction of TV, and social life. We worked hard, we communed together in ritual and hospitality… Yet I found the human relationships difficult and painful causing many contemplative moment alone in my walks with Muffin and Riley, the two golden retrievers that I befriended, who were and still are my constant companions. In the mist of the mountain I pick up a camera and began to photograph my daily walks, I became very personally acquainted with the evolution of the planet, and my bliss was peaked, my wonder never varied.
So it is only that path that I still wander, self taught photographer and Nature lover. You will find me in the wood, much smaller then Easton but just as live and thrilling of each and every walk…
I started this blog a few days ago, and got lost in all the tech stuff… finally had time to look around… so here I am again.
My blogs I hope will be about Photography and Nature, or the nature of photography and the spirit that drives me to photograph and to write this blog… in some ways it is another form of getting the message out about the photography that I do as well as allow others to view and hopefully be inspired by nature, to become conscious of the world around them and how they are treating and how it is treating them. This blog will also be about healthy living, through fresh whole foods, active social community, meaning friends, family, and support systems.
Through the coming weeks, months, years I hope to take us on a spiritual photographic creative journey of our planet Gaia through my experience of emotion, feelings, and most of all Love…