“Do not call the inability to start laziness. Call it fear. Do not call procrastination laziness. Call it fear.” The Artist’s Way
Fear of what? Fear of failure or fear of success? It will be a failure if I do not get this exhibit together, what had stopped me mostly, was the cost, and the inability to see around that. The cost factor of putting this much work together had always been a major reason for my hesitation to agreeing to this Solo exhibit in the first place. Getting my work out there is what had motivated me to say yes, to see it printed and framed, to have work in this area of Philadelphia even if it is only a coffee/waffle shop. The Rittenhouse area of Philadelphia is a major shopping, and business section of the city. The possibilities are endless.
Well I broke my block, I walked through some of my fear. I went to the city with my chosen shots to be printed, while there I visited Bonte’s on 17th St. I introduced myself, check out the space, asked about having a reception on First Friday in May, no problem with that, other than the fact that they are only open until 6:30 pm. So I will have to work on that. I also finally found and visited Balance Studio where my July exhibit is to be. It is a peaceful serene space, that is a massage, yoga studio, quiet with the sense of essential oils.
I was informed that there is space for six pieces not just three which I was told by my contact person. Makes the venture a little more worth the effort to exhibit pieces. Opps ego showing. That is ok because I need a little attention, I needed to give myself attention. I usually do not doubt my work, my art, and creating a themed exhibit with a purpose stopped me in my tracks. It caused me concern, because it meant having new prints made, and not using prints I already had. That being said, I chosen the theme of “the life of leaves” or the evolution of a leaves, with a selection of photos that are from buds, to green, to shades of fall, creating I hope a cycle. These are common everyday events, of course through the seasons but everyday evolutions of life around us. My work has been about “seeing” that, offering the beauty that is right in front of us all the time. I had to call on, or listen to the call of my muse, nature herself. I would not be a photographer today without heeding the message, “that nature desired to be recognized.”
Yes the world get grand views of national parks, vistas beyond belief, and beautiful and as awesome as those are, the world of your back yard, the world of the city park, the path along a river, or a little piece of land with nature is calling for attention. See me, see the beauty, see the evolution that surrounds you.
I have had the honor and the privilege to do just that, to “see” to discover, to uncover nature and hopefully present it to the world.
The Artist’s Way also offers this about being blocked, “Fear is what blocks an artist. The Fear of not being good enough. The fear of not finishing. The fear of failure and of success. The fear of beginning at all. The only one cure for fear. That cure is Love. ”
“Use love for your artist to cure its fear.”
That love is taking care of myself, finding the joy that photography offers me, not finding but allowing it to be that part of me that is joyful. Because when photographing I am lost in the moment, being in that moment allows moments to past unnoticed but at the same time I have been immersed in something deeper and more passionate, the witnessing of Life, ‘seeing’ life from a whole other level. Once again the Artist’s Way states this “Over any extended period of time, being an artist requires enthusiasm more then discipline. Enthusiasm is not an emotional state. It is a spiritual commitment, a loving surround to our creative process, a loving recognition of all the creativity around us.” Being blocked, depressed, hiding in fear does not allow that to happen. Asking for help, from a higher source, from supportive friends, and even the muse itself will allow the commitment to enthusiasm and our creative work to continue to be a way of being.
Growth Question: How do you recognize your fear?