In relationship

You have nothing to learn about relationships. You have only to demonstrate what you already know. Conversations with God Bk 1

Painted sky

In the past few days I have been asked about relationships, and I certainly not an expert, and up front I just wish to state I have not been in what A Course in Miracles calls a “special” relationship for a long long time. The longest relationship I have had is with myself, re-discovering who I am is a full-time activity. It is not until I can be in a fully authentic, healthy, growing relationship with myself and my Higher Power that I will expand that experience to a special or romantic relationship. I will say here that I am closer to that now than I have ever been. Within that statement is the beginning of moving beyond the self-imposed victimhood, the self-imposed denial of a special/romantic relationship. For I desired to find out who I was in relationship to everything else in my life. How I respond or react to social, emotional, financial, physical situations, mostly I withdrew. I withdrew out of anger and fear, I withdrew because no one or nothing could live up to me expectations of them. For my expectations or ideals caused me great hurt, when they where suppose to be emanating Love. When I sought Love from the world around me, I was met with everything that did not look or act like love. I caused great grief and depression.

Painted tree tops

What I have learned through experience is that I have to Be Love, I have to come from a loving place whether others are loving or not. I have to find and experience the spirit in each and every situation, no I still don’t get there all the time but I know now how too, I know now when I am not there, when my expectations are leading the way, (ego) when I am seeking something from some one or something, and not just being fully present in the chaos and even joy to bring and be happiness. Asking myself is this who I am, is this who I desire to be at this moment, is this a loving thought or action, if not how can I Be more loving in this situation?

In the Book Conversations with God Book: an uncommon dialogue. Book 1, Neale Donald Walsch is in conversational dialogue with God, ( I know I hear your doubt or maybe I even hear your joy) this book to me has been the doors and windows to my soul, the light on my path, the scripture I keep returning to, the guidance I seek when I am off the path.  Conversations with God (CwG) is a book about relationships, a book about how to be in relationships with yourself with your understanding of who and what God is to you, it is about our relationship with everything, it is about Oneness without ever saying so out rightly.

There is one chapter in CwG 1 that discussing “relationships” loud and clear. Chapter 8 in this chapter Neale ask what we all ask “Is there a way to be happy in relationships?” And God answers with this at the beginning, “Relationship are constantly challenging; constantly calling you to create, express, and experience higher and higher aspects of yourself, grander and grander visions of yourself, ever more magnificent versions of yourself. Nowhere can you do this more immediately, impactfully, and immaculately than in relationships. In fact, without relationships, you can not do it at all.”

These words sung to me, enlightened my path, all it’s defects, and imperfections,  my experience with all my relationships, but first it destroyed all my notions of relationships, and many relationships I had to reevaluate, and many were left behind, so that the beauty and creativity of relationship could begin to inform and grow in grander and grander experience. My heart broke open, sadness and joy danced together, one informing the other, that a balance was the way to live in happiness.

So it was myself I had to put first, not in an egoic way for I had already walked that path, now was a time to find out who I was and it was not what I was told by others, because living my life the way I had lived thus far, in the world was the world lived by others, unconscious doing. CwG once again makes this statement and I think many, if not all people seeking, walking a spiritual path will need to ask and find out. God says; … determining what is best for you will require you to also determine what it is you are trying to do. This is an important step that many people ignore. What are you “up to”? What is your purpose in life”? Without answers to these questions, the matter of what is “best” in any given circumstance with remain a mystery.”

one of many paths

For now I am leaving the mystery to you to find out. My blog/morning pages have been about re-discovering who I am in relationship to myself, my creativity, and the world around me. For without walking that path, without being conscious relationships are unhappy and unfullfilling… Life is one of the most amazing adventures we experience on this plane, living in from the heart fully present is a blessing to all Life.

Growth question: Do you know what you life purpose is? Do you know what you are up to?

I am Love, Jeff

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11 thoughts on “In relationship”

  1. Jeff, I love it when you said, “The longest relationship I have had is with myself, re-discovering who I am is a full-time activity.” This post was very special to read — thank you for sharing it.

    Growth question: Do you know what you life purpose is? Do you know what you are up to?

    I determined my purpose to be a channel for grace (Divine Love); a heart-based agent for positive change.

    1. Laurie,

      Well it is true, the longest conscious relationship I have had is with myself and the Divine…
      How was this post special to you?

      Yes I was very aware that you have found as well as living your purpose!

      I am Love, Jeff

  2. Jeff — at the dreamwork shamanic workshop this past weekend, in one of the exercises, I saw a vision of a Native American (Indian) woman holding a drum with an eagle’s head painted on it. I asked one of my teachers (a Navajo woman who lives in a pueblo) what message was I to get from this vision. She said that the woman is me in a prior lifetime, but during that lifetime, I became enamored with being white, envied white people, and in this life time, I chose to be born white. However, I did not have any skills to be white and the white people did not appreciate my native knowledge so I quickly forgot it to survive. She said that I need to reconnect with my innate knowledge that I know so well. I said that sometimes when I try, I feel my ego start rising and I back down because I don’t want to get all egotistical about reclaiming what I know so well. She said “that’s okay. Having an ego is the penalty for being white.” I am going to learn to be fully and authentically me along with my ego — that is my purpose.

    1. Barbara,

      Thank you for sharing that journey with me! I wonder what your thoughts are on your vision, rather then that of another interrupation from her persecpetion?

      I am Love, Jeff

  3. Jeff, I love reading your musings. I love that you are dedicated to BEING LOVE. To yourself! To the love which is YOU. You inspire me all the time. Your question? Do I know what I am up to? My life purpose? It is becoming aware of what I truly am, beyond personality, beyond stories, beyond appearances. On the other hand–am enjoying the personality, stories and appearance while it exists!

    1. Kathy,

      My mission here is just to jog my own memory, to move from the shell of humanness to vibrate at a higher level.
      I see that it is your mission/purpose as well, I have witness, of course only in words, your own evolution in the past few years…
      Thank you so much for coming by and commenting!!!

  4. Jeff I have come to believe that my purpose is to walk in the sunshine of my soul. Over the years this purpose has led me deeper into myself and into the world around me. I rarely skip across the surface of life but prefer to settle into a moment. You are good company in places like this because you too are reflecting, observing, learning and questioning. Thank you for being you.

  5. Do you know what you life purpose is? Do you know what you are up to?

    Hello Jeff,
    I do like your post and your photos are awesome.
    I come visiting now and then, once in awhile I comment.
    Your question today seems interesting to me. I believe my purpose is to enjoy the life I have been given, to share my talents and gifts with everyone in my life. “Sharing” is my purpose. Teaching is my profession. Giving is my vocation. I am reading The Power, and it talks a lot about love. Because we know love is all there is, you have to give love to everything in order to receive anything. You must even love the bills that come to your mail box!! But in doing so you have shared yourself, opened yourself and bought back to you what you give. You see I also do not believe life is suppose to be hard. The true purpose, if we have one, is to be thankful and grateful for what is in front of us. Because once again my truth, we are where we are suppose to be, doing just what we are suppose to be doing.
    I wish you a wonderfull festive Thanksgiving.
    ~Jean

    1. Jean,

      I believe whenever someone can articulate their purpose they are on the right path. Your response seems much like the process Laurie uses to express her path… well done.
      Thank you so much for taking a look see at my photos and commenting!
      Happy Thanksgiving to you as well!

      I am Love, Jeff

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